Thank you for subscribing to my newsletter. I question your sanity by making this choice, dear reader, but I do applaud your courage as you once again embark on the journey to crazy town. Wow, I am such a geek. Or is it dork, I know not dweeb. I think geek. I am making geeky sexy, damn it! Oh lordy, I am even embarrassed of myself, for myself. And we digress…..surprise, surprise.
So many tangies running through my head ( you think I would be used to this by now, since it has been like this my entire life, 24 hours*/day).
- Should we discuss how once again, I am back starting a diet……. A clear violation of “codes to a better life”?
- Should we discuss how I should write…..”codes to a better life”?
- Should we discuss how my newly decided ( for the umpteenth time….) spending less time at work/with work ruling my life is making me feel guilty (even though work can’t leave this life with me and I need/deserve to de-stress and other’s put their lives/family first and I don’t…hum, seems I have started discussing it) ? Plus, I believe it is making the students/part-time help at work think I am lazy and … oh, crapola – you get the point.
- Should we discuss how I think I am addicted to parenthesis (seriously, I think I am), that I can’t live my life (or at least write) without them and how this makes me ashamed (really, truly ashamed) that I will get turned in my the grammar police ( even though I said I would only blog if I wrote like I typed and did not edit – with the exception of spelling, because my spelling problems are simply atrocious, if not slightly amusing)? I am now afraid I may have a hyphen addiction as well. Damn, I have issues. I am a perfectly lovely human being with MAJOR ISSUES minor flaws that make me a weirdo unique and endearing.
- Should we discuss why I need to come up with a better name than “in-laws” for Ska’s family ? Simply put, they rock. I am a truly lucky woman to have had all of them as part of the package deal (oh, who are we kidding, they made the package a DEAL!). Yes, I am lucky brat and you may hate me for my awesome family. Hate away, biotches. I deserve some goodness
- Should we discuss why even though Ska said the other day something that would bother most women, that I had ‘reached m level of fatness’ and I really needed to lose weight ( in a nice way), I fell more deeply in love with him. (I have gained even more whale fat weight!).
- Should we discuss that I have decided to no longer end these questions with a ?.
- Should I write, finally, why my neighbor saw my derrière (poop mentioned #8) or assettes (the ass and the little asses underneath the main ass. Hey, I like the way it sounds, even thought I used to deplore the name ass) as I know affectionately call them.
- Should I discuss how I think even though should be one word and not two. Also, how on EVERY SINGLE one of these bullets, I have had to correct shoudl to should. No, not because I copied and pasted, because I am really that dumb.
So, you get to pick readerettes, I am sure you will eventually hear about all of them, numerous, numerous times, but still – What would you like to hear (can I use that when one writes? Why must I always correct hear to read????) first?
* not that there is actually 24 hours in a day. Do not get me started on this! This has been bothering me since I was 6 years old and I am afraid of opening the can-of-worms oh, shit, who are we kidding. I will blabber on about anything, anywhere, anytime. Olympic babbler here!! Bring on the competitors! How about a triathlon with procrastination and lack of follow through. ( aparantly, I need to bone up on my vocabulary as well…..). Damn , the reasonings for why I called myself Muse and not Gabby are becoming less and less clear.
